Thursday, October 01, 2015

Published Thursday, October 01, 2015 by

Finding hope in a new school



We have started in a new school and are hopeful that our struggles are behind us. 

The Deputy Head and school teacher came to meet my Son to see if they felt that they would be an appropriate setting to support his needs, and seemed so supportive of trying to help. I didn't know how to react when they told them that they would do everything they could, so I smiled, closed the door and burst into tears.

We will do everything we can to help your son
--Deputy Head of our new school 


At last there was someone with a kind word, an offer of help and some assurances that we are not facing this on our own. We have now started at the school, and I truly hope they mean those words as it has not been an easy start.

Increasing Pressure

The first few weeks of school were not easy, especially in the mornings as I had to battle with my Son who refused to get dressed and literally had to be carried to the car when he refused to leave. Once at school, he refused to let go of me and my heart would break as he had to be pulled off me so I could leave.

The constant pressure to try get him into school, the fear of being asked to leave another school who were not able to hope with his behaviour and my attempts  to try retain some level of sanity at work took it's toll. My frustration levels were at an all time high as I begged, pleaded and often snapped when he refused to co-operate in doing anything, this was then followed by intense remorse for not having stayed calmer when he kicked, hit and bit me.

A Kind Word

Once again the teacher was there, and this time she floored me when she asked "How about you, are you ok?" after a particularly bad morning when I'd had to dodge the missiles being thrown at my head from the back of the car whilst driving to school. This time I couldn't hold back the tears until I was alone and out of sight - the emotions were just too high and I broke down in the middle of the school office.

The school were not only there for my Son, but were also there for us. They understand the pressure that we face as a family due to the many challenges that come with parenting someone who is on the spectrum - and seem to genuinely want to help - not just him, but all of us.

A hopeful future

We are still having struggles with my Son's behaviour at school, but the teacher continues to assure me during our fortnightly coffee catch ups that she is positive that we are making progress and that we just need to work out what is causing this behaviours. With each week, we have been able to relax just a little bit more,  more knowing that the teachers are doing all that they can to try and help him.

Working together, I am hopeful that we will find a way to help my Son and enable him to start overcome the challenges we have faced so far.


What does good support at school mean to you, and what great things have you seen put into place?